Tag: Toronto (page 1 of 6)

I’m outta here!

Dear Karen,

Well, I’m outta here.  Gone.  But only for a week.

I’ll be back, though, but I thought you should know where I’m going, and why. Continue reading

Back to the future…again!

Dear Karen,

One man, one woman, one cat.  That’s how Lars and I started out. Continue reading

An autumn visit to Ontario

Dear Karen,

After more than two weeks in Toronto, I’m finally back in London.  As much as I love being home, I do miss  Canada, mostly because I finally got the chance to spend 14 whole days there, with my little grandson.  Oh yeah, and his parents.  They’re kind of important, too! Continue reading

Computerless in Ottawa

Dear Wendy,

Well, this is a new one on me. As you know, Adrian and I drove to Toronto over the weekend to meet up with you and the rest of the family for little Scott’s baptism. Continue reading

Senior Badasses: Cane to the genitals helps foil robbery

Dear Wendy,

For years now, I’ve been telling my (slightly alarmed) children that when I’m old enough to need a cane, I plan to get one with a big honking spike on the end. Because you just never know.

And last night, I heard a story that confirmed my plan.

It happened this way:

This past Sunday afternoon, an 82-year-old woman was heading into her Toronto apartment building carrying an armload of groceries. Some dude followed her into the building, offering to help her with her bags. He tried to push her into her apartment so he could grab her jewellery and some cash, but she started screaming. As one does.

One of her neighbours, a gentleman named Chin-Hua Chen, sprinted to the rescue. The robber hit and tried to push him out of the way, but a homeless fellow who’d set up housekeeping in the stairwell ran upstairs to help, punching the robber to subdue him.


Back off, sonny-boy. I’m armed for bear.

Then in stormed 71-year-old Jane Harris, armed with her cane, which has a jagged edge so she can navigate Toronto’s icy sidewalks in winter.

Harris wasted no time: using her cane, she jabbed the would-be robber in a sensitive part of his anatomy, immobilizing him so she could call the cops.

I heard Harris interviewed on CBC Radio’s As It Happens last night. She described how the three neighbours held the hapless robber pinned up against a stairwell wall, while she called the cops, telling them to boot it over to the building and arrest the no-goodnik.

And step on it, my good man. We have a miscreant here.


Things you don’t want in your crotch. Want one? Try this link: http://www.elderstore.com/5-prong-ice-grip-cane-attachment.aspx

My favourite bit:

Interviewer: “Where did you hold your cane exactly?”

Harris: “In the man’s genitals.” And then she laughed. It was a long, knowing laugh.

At one point the interviewer asked if Harris had been frightened. She replied, “If anyone comes after me, unless they shoot me, they’re gonna get hurt.”

Jane, you are totally badass. I like your style. And if I ever manage to start my Hell’s Grannies gang, you’re invited.

If you’d like to check out the video, you’ll find it here.

And now, I must head out. I’m off to buy a cane. With a spike.



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